Longings

Some days my heart yearns with heavenly longings.

Some days the sadness of this earth threatens to overwhelm me with its brokenness.

When I see the confusion, the hurt, the desperation of hearts searching, the utter lostness of a world floundering to obtain love in all the wrong places.

It is in these moments I am most reminded I am not created for this earth.

This world was never destined to hold the answer to the desires of my heart’s quest.

No matter how amazing the temporal can be, it remains temporary. Each earthly relationship merely a quick-fix for this innate desire to be known and accepted. Just as I am.

This mystery of heavenly longing goes beyond all things natural, yet I seldom ponder the truth of living in my smoke-screened reality. Too often appeased by a mirage. Too readily succumbing to the illusion of happily-ever-after in earthly garb. I forget the confines of my mortality as I go through the motions of routine activity, content to while away my days, forgetting they are so very few.

But when I pause to glance heavenward, I remember.

It is in these moments of looking up that I reach beyond the finite and bump against the whispers of God-breath caressing me with Your presence. It is here that the deepest parts of me come to life, when I am most aware of my eternal value and my eternal existence. It is here that I am drawn further into Your waves of grace, immersed in a love that goes beyond what mortal eyes can behold.

There is a fascination that moves me toward You, Father. An ache that pulls me into Your presence, past these gasps for earthly fulfillment. I shift a little nearer and am wrapped in wonder as I move deeper into the mystery of Your love.

And suddenly, I am overwhelmed with the longing to return home as I teeter between the now and the not yet.

In this ache to be done with this earth, I ask You to balance my heart. Breathe Your peace into my spirit. Pound out the steady rhythm of Hope’s heartbeat against my own as You dare me to live true and love large while I wait.

Unite this division in my soul. Bridge the present with Your eternal presence and remind me all is well because You are here.

Here where I cannot see clearly.

Here where sin seems to have won out.

Here where I most need You to be.

Architect of the Infinite, come and set things right once more as You consume this darkness with the light of heaven’s glow bending earthward.

Let salvation work its magic for now and for forever.

Turn my heart toward home even as I live on foreign sod, and let Your glory be a part of every moment… until every moment becomes eternal.

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